Travelling Neurodivergently: Bucharest, Romania

Part 1: Airports, flights, and a very big spa

My partner, Dan, and I really love to travel, but as we are both neurodivergent, it’s fair to say that we can find the process as stressful as we do enjoyable. We spent our last Bank Holiday weekend before Christmas in Bucharest for our friends’ wedding.

Bucharest, or Romania as a whole, hadn’t really been on my ‘must see’ list, but all the same, I was excited to visit a new place. The city, however, was an extremely pleasant surprise: a sort of mix of Brussels and somewhere like Portugal, extremely warm, and very interesting indeed. From museums about peasants, the heaviest building in the world (bar the Great Pyramid at Giza), and a huge spa, Bucharest has a lot to offer for a city break.

Airports and Flights

Our flight was at a rather unsociable 9am from Birmingham Airport, so we got up at 4am, having had less than a full night’s sleep between us, and drove to the airport. We could have stayed in a hotel overnight, but we wanted to minimise time away from the cats, and, we wouldn’t have had that much more sleep staying in a Premier Inn. It’s just over a 2-hour journey from Somerset up to Birmingham, mostly spent on the M5. Driving at 5am is a surprisingly pleasant experience. We listened to the World Service on Radio 4, making sure to turn up the shipping forecast of course, and there were very few cars on the road. Interestingly, pretty much on the dot of 6am, several lorries joined the motorway, making it all a little bit busier. We arrived (at the wrong car park because it turns out I really do need to check things twice) around 6:45am, and once we’d found the correct car park, parked and got a bus to the terminal.

As we were going for 5 nights, we didn’t feel we needed hold luggage, and so headed straight up to security. Birmingham Airport is going through a renovation at the moment, and so much of the check-in hall is behind scaffolding. Security is up an escalator, and it was a little stressful as we needed to eat our breakfast prior to going through security but were hurried on by an airport worker.

Going through security is never the most enjoyable part of flying, particularly if you are neurodivergent. It tends to be very busy, a little unpredictable, and a lot of people worry that they will inadvertently behave in such a way that they will be questioned or searched. We put our bags into the trays, making sure to have electronics and liquids on show, and then walked through the metal detector. Dan and I were fine, but a man in front of us caused the detector to beep and was required to use the full body scanner. He tried to argue this, which seemed a little ridiculous to me: if the choice is have a full body scan or not fly, there’s only really one option.

Having got through the scanners without incident, I was a little dismayed to see my cabin suitcase being channelled off into the “suspicious item” lane. I had to queue at a desk where a member of security staff would look at your bag’s X-ray, and then in your bag. There was quite a big wait for this, as a large family in front of me had also had their bags pulled due to an abundance of liquids which hadn’t been placed in plastic bags. The grandmother of the family was the main culprit, causing her son to say “For God’s sake, mum, you’re going to Florida, not f***ing vanity fair” in the most stereotypical black country accent you can imagine. Finally, my bag was checked, and it turned out to be the metal handle of my Grüum razor, which will teach me to attempt to be eco-friendly. The razor handle was deemed not to be a threat, and so it was on to a well-deserved coffee in the departure lounge.

Something I found myself thinking on this trip, particularly on the way back, was about the provision of Special Assistance. We saw a sign to the “Sunflower room”, and Dan joked “ah, the autism room”, but even though we both have sensory and organisational challenges in airports, it wouldn’t occur to us to book Special Assistance. I think there’s a deep-seated thing of knowing that we basically can manage an airport without assistance, and therefore it wouldn’t be appropriate for us to ask for help. However, not having to stand in queues and having quieter areas to wait would make our airport experience much more bearable. I think when you are late diagnosed you get so used to the discomfort of everyday life that it’s difficult to accept help which is available to you. You pride yourself on your ability to cope, your ability to not need help, on not making a fuss. And yet the price is being more overwhelmed, more tired, and ultimately more stressed. This being said, I am unsure that we will ever feel comfortable booking Special Assistance at airports. I think it’s the presence of somebody ‘helping’ you which feels uncomfortable — it’s yet another person to interact with. This is probably not especially rational, but sometimes just one more person to deal with is too many.

We were flying with Wizz Air, and our friend, the one who is getting married, had ribbed us all week for picking them as an airline, due to their history of delays. And it’s true, we were delayed, something which was communicated to us via text whilst driving. The plane was an Airbus 321neo, which is a single aisle, narrow-body aircraft. As we expected for a budget carrier, there were no bells and whistles. As we wanted to take hand luggage in the cabin, we had paid a bit extra for Priority Boarding, which meant we were able to board within the first influx of people. Had this not come with the privilege of a proper-sized hand luggage bag, I would not have paid extra for this — we had assigned seats, and it doesn’t massively matter when you get onto a plane. We had also paid a bit extra to be sat together, something which I don’t feel should be an added-extra, but that I appreciate works to offer a lower-cost option for those who don’t wish to pay.

I have a funny relationship with flying. I didn’t fly until I was 18, going to Berlin on my own, and I was entranced by the whole experience until we came to the runway, where my excitement turned to pure fear as I left the ground for the first time. I’ve flown a fair bit since then, and yet I always forget how much I dislike taking off. Once we are in the air, it’s fine. It’s the anticipation of it, the bit where the plane revs its engines and speeds up along the runway. The first initial stomach drop as you realise you’ve lost contact with the ground. But once I am up in the air, it’s magical. I’m a huge fan of Google Maps and can spend hours clicking about looking at places from above. In a plane, it’s just Google maps in real time, unless it’s particularly cloudy. As soon as I can see the little towns and villages below, my fear dissipates, and instead I feel awe that this is the way in which we can travel.

Noise cancelling headphones are, of course, a neurodivergent essential in so many situations, but particularly on a plane. The flight out, however, was not particularly noisy (apart from multiple people seemingly receiving texts at thirty-nine thousand feet – how?!), so neither of us opted to use them. This was potentially not quite the right choice; by the time we arrived in Bucharest we were both feeling very sensorily overloaded. We had a good wind behind us, so the flight took around two and a half hours, and adding in the time difference, we arrived at Otopeni Airport at around 3pm.

We knew the weather was going to be warm in Bucharest, but the humidity hit us immediately as we left the plane. The passport area was not very well-airconditioned, and we were soon dripping with sweat whilst we stood in the “non-EU” passport queue. It took around half an hour before our passports were stamped. We had officially arrived.

At this point, we went our separate ways. The bride had very kindly invited me to her Romanian hen do, and so I was off to a very large spa, leaving Dan to check into our hotel. One of the other ‘hens’ was at the airport at the same time, so, once I had worked out who she was (this took so much longer than it should have) we joined up and shared a lift to the spa.

Therme Spa

Therme spa is about fifteen minutes from the airport and is one of the largest spas in Europe. It is situated within a large glass atrium, and has three different areas: The Palm, which mimics a tropical holiday destination with swim-up bars; Elysium, which features several saunas and wellness areas; and Galaxy, which is a huge indoor water park. You can purchase tickets for just The Palm and Galaxy, or for all three areas, which is what we did. 3 hours costs around 115 Romanian Lei, or £20, which is an absolute bargain for all that you have access too.

On arrival at the spa, you receive a wristband which acts as your wallet and locker key for your visit. The number of your locker is written on the band, and this acts as a system to stop too many people using each changing area. The rules for the spa are reasonably strict: you must bring a towel, and you must have clean flip flops or sliders that you aren’t wearing. They ask you to show these on arrival, and if you don’t have them you are required to buy them from the spa. We were all prepared, but judging by the TripAdvisor reviews, this can be quite a pricey mistake to make. There was an area to put luggage before you entered the barriers: from the sheer amount of luggage, it’s clear a lot of people do head straight to Therme from the airport as I did.

Having met everybody except the bride for the first time, we headed for The Palm. This is a large swimming pool with bubble jets, a lot of palm trees, and a swim up bar. We headed to the bar to buy cocktails, which were 30 lei, or around £5.20, and were very nice indeed (I went for a Pina Colada, of course). The water in the pool is pleasantly warm, and deep enough to submerge you up to around your chest, but not so deep that you need to swim everywhere. The outdoor pool has a set of revolving doors which take you outside, where there are more bubble jets, some massaging showers, and another bar. As we went outside I was told off for not having my hair up (something I had missed on the initial rules), but the barperson just handed me a hairband, and that was the end of the matter. We spent a happy hour bobbing around with our cocktails, although we found the features were a little crowded and it was difficult to get a place in the jacuzzi areas and bubble beds.

We decided to head up to Elysium after this, but first we were alerted to the presence of some waterbed massage machines. These cost a little bit extra, just under £3 for 10 minutes, but it was genuinely one of the best massage experiences I have ever had. It really does feel like there are little hands within the water beds, which is, admittedly, a little disconcerting. This was ideal after several hours of travel and standing in queues, and I appreciated the full body effect.

The Elysium area was upstairs and through some further barriers. There is a huge choice of saunas in this area, some of which were busier than others. We went for the Himalayan salt sauna, which was the ideal sauna temperature: not too hot, but warm enough to be pleasant. The walls were tiled with salt blocks, and I was thrilled to discover I was not the only person who had a secret hankering to lick the wall — although quite why I voiced this I have no idea. From the salt sauna we went into the lotus shower, which was several gallons of cold water thundering down from a giant lotus flower installation. This was very refreshing indeed — and perfect after the sauna — although after a while it did get a bit cold. It was at this point that Raluca, the bride, realised that her strong prescription sunglasses were no longer on the ledge outside the sauna, which was a real problem as she can’t see without them. We spent quite a bit of time looking for them, but fortunately somebody not in our party had spotted a pair of sunglasses in the restaurant area. We’ve no idea how they ended up there (maybe they were hungry?), but we found the staff were very willing to help, and Raluca was duly reunited with her vision.

The final thing we checked out in the Elysium area was a mineral pool, which also had a bar in the centre. This was very warm and had very pretty pearl tiles. The presence of the bar did slightly spoil the tranquillity of the pool, but it was an opportunity to get another cocktail (an “eternal summer” this time, which was melon, elderflower, and orange flavoured, and delicious). As we got out of the mineral pool, an aqua aerobics session started in the palm area, with extremely loud dance music playing. This, I have to say, did make the Elysium area feel a bit less relaxing than advertised.

With just an hour left, we decided to go into the Galaxy area, which was quite a change of pace from Elysium. This is the only area where children are allowed, and the uptick in noise was extremely noticeable, with a fair amount of screaming from the slides. I was keen to go on a slide, but not everyone in our party was, so it was just three of us who approached the steps to the slide complex. Immediately I was pulled up for wearing my smart watch, which was a bit irritating as I couldn’t see anyone to look after it, or anywhere to put it without going back to my locker. I settled on rolling it up in my towel, which was a bit risky, but went without incident.

We chose one of the longer but milder slides, not really feeling the queues for the bigger ones, and this was fun. The sheer number of slides was impressive. I was a frequent visitor to the health and safety nightmare which was AquaSplash in Hemel Hempstead as a child, and until visiting Therme, this was the peak of my water park experiences. However, unlike Therme, AquaSplash was always oddly freezing, and there were always plasters and bits of hair floating around. Therme was always pleasantly warm, and just so incredibly clean. I could have spent much longer in the slide area, although you do have to have a pretty good tolerance of excited children to spend time there.

We finished our visit by going into the second outdoor area, where I excitedly said I could see ‘steam’ coming up from an area just beyond the pool. We all headed over to investigate, hoping for a thermal treat, but found it to be the spray from some sprinklers. Oops. Then it was time to get changed (quite difficult since my towel had fallen in a puddle at the last minute), and to pay our tabs on the way out. This was easy as there were self-service checkouts at which to scan your wristband, and upon presentation of your receipt you were released back into the terrestrial world.

Therme was a great location for a hen party, and worth far more than the entrance fee. Three hours flew by, and I would recommend going for as long as you are able to spare if you decide to visit. Just don’t forget your towel and flip flops.

In Part 2, we spend our first full day in Bucharest, eat at Caru’ Cu Bere, and drink more sparkling water than we ever thought was possible.